If you’re like most people, you can probably remember a time when you lost your cool, blew a gasket, hit the wall, or ended up stuck in self-hatred. You’ve crashed and burned.
Welcome to humanity. You’re not alone.
In those moments when you feel like a complete failure, take a step back. Your spirit isn’t in control ~ a posse of riders on your bus have charged up the aisle and taken over in a radical coup. But this is a gift: something is triggering them so you can see the demons that are still hiding under your psychic couch. That’s actually productive, because without seeing it you won’t be able to deal with it properly. Don’t tell yourself that you are somehow not OK ~ as if it were true, which it clearly isn’t.
So here’s what you do: practice mindfulness. You may think you don’t have time for this kind of break, but it is precisely this out-breath that will help you stabilize the rest of your life. Bring yourself back to your heart. Remember that you are a part of the universal field. Breathe. Slow. Down.
You’ll notice I didn’t suggest that you discuss with your partner, mate, or co-worker the actual physical events that woke up your riders. Start with listening carefully to yourself and managing your energy. Give yourself a solid period of self-care before you approach anyone else.
And then, when you’re ready, take it slow. Notice when you get into a landscape that upsets you. Allow your vulnerability to be held in a sacred way by people you trust. Re-learn the truth that you have forgotten: that you are loved, perfect, and whole.