The Disappointment Trap

Did you ever make the decision to not expect anything of anyone because then you wouldn’t be disappointed?

Do you hate saying no to people ~ or turn into a grouch when things don’t turn out the way you had hoped?

Or have you decided to be satisfied with security rather than reach out for your big dreams?

All of these are signs that you are carrying disappointment in your psyche.  If you don’t deal with it, you will continue to attract situations and people that disappoint you. Your own personal Groundhog Day.

I don’t know about you, but I’m only a fan of repetition when it’s good stuff.  

When I experience repeating patterns that don’t feel good, I look inside of myself to find and disable the attractor patterns so I can create a different experience in the future. Mindfulness is the tool I use to do that.

“Attractor patterns” might be a new concept for you. They’re the energetic foundation on top of which you build your thoughts and feelings. They’re the imprints from what occurred at a particular time in your life. But don’t make the mistake of feeling stuck with them — these patterns can be changed. They don’t indicate who you really are. 

So if you’re walking around attracting disappointment, take a look inside. The attractor pattern underneath it is this: you experienced a traumatic disappointment, and you never really came to peace about it. Maybe you got stuck in trying to understand why it happened. Unfortunately, this doesn’t work to bring you to peace of mind.

Ah, the folly of denied forgiveness.

We continue to create from what we refuse to release.

When you forgive you aren’t saying that the person who let you down was right. You aren’t approving of their actions or letting them off the hook for their consequences. You are simply deciding not to be disappointed about what happened any more. You are taking the rocks out of your proverbial backpack and putting them down on the ground.

When you forgive, you’ll notice a few shifts in your consciousness that will show you’re moving in the right direction.

1. You will gracefully accept boundaries, such as when others tell you “no”.

2. You won’t mind telling other people, places, or situations “no”.

3. If something doesn’t turn out the way you intended it to, your essential belief in the rightness of the world will remain unshaken. You will still see possibilities for moving forward.

4.  You will explore life without fear because you are no longer attached to staying “safe”. You’ll use discernment to make better choices for yourself as a result.

And finally, when this whole concept really lands for you:

5. You will know that if you don’t get what you thought you wanted, you will get something even better. 

Unlocking the old attractor patterns of disappointment is easy: just forgive what’s come before, and let the past come to rest. From a new foundation in the present moment and in your own power, you can create your future — unafraid.

To your success,